The Global Nomad

AsianBoston: The Global Nomad in Paris

2010-03-09T13:37:00.000-08:00

I am secretly attracted to eccentricity, but does that mean I am a magnet for the crazy, the lonely, the relentlessly peculiar? On my flight to Paris yesterday, I was sitting next to an insane man. He started by requesting Perrier and orange juice, which seemed innocuous enough, but then he deliberately filled his glass with mineral water to the absolute brink. We both watched the liquid wobble unsteadily back and forth for three seconds, and then predictably, it rose above the edge of the plastic cup and landed on the tray and in his lap. He then took his juice and did the same thing. One couldn't even have hoped to pick up the cup without a spill. Wordlessly, I handed him my napkin.

A moment later the flight attendant was about to move from our row when all of a sudden he requested peanuts. He repeated the request and she turned abruptly and said, "Monsieur, un moment, s’il vous plaît." He settled back into his seat and I head him chanting softly, "Peanuts, peanuts, peanuts..." She dropped two small bags in front of him and wheeled away. To my relief, he crunched away silently... for two minutes. He robustly declared "J’adore peanuts" in an attempt at conversation and I reached for my book. He then pulled out the in-flight magazine and opened to a page in the middle. He stared at the French words like he was trying to picture them naked and continued eating. All of a sudden, he began coughing hysterically. I thought he might be choking on a peanut but then his fit subsided to the occasional cough and some throat clearing. In French, I asked him if he wanted a cough drop. He looked at me blankly and I repeated my offer, when he replied that he didn't speak French. "Oh, I thought that since you were reading the magazine.." No, he had just started taking Dutch lessons and wanted to see if he could understand any of the French words.

As gently as I could, I suggested that since Dutch and French were not in the same family of languages, drawing any superficial similarities might be difficult. To which he replied, but all those European languages are really the same. With dismay, I realised I could no longer pass him off as a quirky little Frenchman, but one of those idiotic Americans. He called out to the flight attendant and pointing to me, asked "Could I have her peanuts?" She shot me a look of sympathy and gave him two more bags. He handed her the empty Perrier bottle, which he dropped into my lap en route. As he started reaching around the floor beneath my legs, I motioned for him to stop, and handed her the aluminum can myself. He apologised sheepishly and then launched into a critique about the difference between honey roasted and plain roasted peanuts (I wish I were making this up), and I decided to efficiently end the conversation. I opened my book, turned away from him and to my left, and began reading. Ten minutes later, he was starting a monologue on the big peanut conspiracy and I was wondering what I could stab myself with. At this point I had gone from monosyllabic replies, to occasional nods, to complete indifference. Yet he was still talking and on his seventh bag of peanuts. I looked up when a popcorn kernel landed in the middle of my book.

The adorable little nightmare sitting across the aisle had discovered that her new favorite hobby was throwing her popcorn at me. Two more kernels landed in my lap and her mother scolded her half-heartedly before smiling indulgently at her antics. I tried to give the three-year old a stern, exasperated look but failed when she winked prettily at me. I winked back, knowing that she would grow up and someday cause some unsuspecting man indescribable heartache. The peanut man looked over at the growing pile of popcorn in my lap and in a stage whisper said, "SOME people can be SO inconsiderate of their fellow passengers." The one-hour flight was already feeling ten days long.

Dante’s definition of hell is proximity without intimacy. In this case, proximity was working quite well on its own.

AsianBoston: Global Nomad in Turkey

2010-03-09T12:54:00.000-08:00

It serves me right for moving to Turkey without a plan beyond landing at the airport. I'll spare you the details of the saga (and indeed it was a saga), but I have finally made it. I am temporarily living in a place called the Superdorm (I'm not kidding) with three 19 year olds who are (admirably) as focused on their classes as they are on the boys next door, but I wanted adventure and this is it. I spent the first few days running around and settling in. I tried to get a converter/adaptor to plug into the wall for my computer and trying to explain what I wanted at the shop was quite a challenge. To both my amusement and distress, I left when I realised the shopkeeper thought I was describing something pornographic. Sigh. Needless to say, I still haven't managed to locate one.

Istanbul has captivated me. It is filled with inconsistencies and subtleties and bubbles with passion. The nightlife is reminiscent of New York in a disconcerting way, but there are just so many eclectic options. The men can be very beautiful, with their dark hair and green eyes, but since my attraction to someone is so verbal, the language barrier makes all that attractiveness moot. I am running around in sweat pants and sneakers and it is glorious to feel like a student again and have time to read. The boys on campus (and believe me they are boys in every sense of the word) shyly come up to me with the most adorable and inane excuses. I have been roaming around the city as well and just looking at the stunning view of the Bosphorus fills me with contentment.

I know I have to live near the water some day. The interludes of loneliness here are somehow more poignant with the added sense of isolation. How are you doing? Is all well in New York? I've had some very "interesting" moments here thus far. Some day I'll tell you about the advantages of being mistaken as an Asian film star. My life would be unbelievable as a work of fiction.

AsianBoston: The Global Nomad in London

2009-11-29T14:49:00.000-08:00

Oct 2009-We are in London. And what a crazy life we lead. Our first night was in a windowless hotel room one block from a prison, and of course we didn't know this because I left booking our hotel to the last hour…literally. As I left for Logan to catch our flight to London, I realized that my single days of just showing up in a random country and figuring it out once I arrived, wasn't going to work with two kids in tow. So I quickly booked a hotel with stylish photos of their rooms, amenities, and lobby. And it was surprisingly affordable for London.

We visited another area of London and found a decent hotel where I was able to negotiate a better rate by speaking directly with the manager and waiving daily breakfast and housekeeping. We all settled in and went out to dinner to celebrate our newly won residency in Central London. All was going well, when three hours later I started vomiting. What I thought was food poisoning turned out to be swine flu, and within a day all of us were in bed. The babies were miserable and shared that fact for five consecutive days. I was ready to go home and this was day three of our trip.

Fully recovered and exploring London has been the best part of this trip thus far. Museums in London are free and a great place for everyone, regardless of whether you are lugging around kids or trying to meet someone. Strolling through Hyde Park and Kensington Gardens in the fall means colorful changing leaves, ducks so domesticated that they walk by within inches of your legs, and toddlers with adorable British accents asking mummies for a biscuit.
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Tip #1: Never judge a hotel by its website photos. Check reviews, get recommendations, and have a sense of the neighborhood first. Who cares if you have high thread count sheets if you can't walk outside without security? In a pinch, go with a large chain where you have recourse and always book using a credit card. (www.tripadvisor.com)

Tip #2: Always travel with medical coverage. If you aren't covered by your employer, you can purchase optional protection online, often with your airline, hotel, or travel agent. You never know if you will fall down the Harrod's escalator and sprain an ankle, run smack into an iron pole outside the London Eye, or get caught up in a global pandemic (all three which have happened to me). www.travelguard.com
Also, consider registering you travel with the State Dept, who can contact you in case of crisis or emergency. https://travelregistration.state.gov

Tip #3: Every city has attractions that won't break the bank. London is filled with museums, public parks, outdoor markets, window shopping, and great walks. Some true gems:

Royal Opera House (free lunchtime recitals)
http://www.roh.org.uk/whatson/production.aspx?pid=11075

Golders Hill Park (visit the butterfly house)
http://www.camden.gov.uk/ccm/content/contacts/non-council-contacts/contact-golders-hill-park.en

Tate Modern (stroll along the Thames after high tea)
http://www.tate.org.uk/modern/

Natural History Museum (the dinosaur exhibit)
http://www.nhm.ac.uk

BBC television (free) audience tickets
http://www.bbc.co.uk/tickets/